Symbols, Words and Gardens!

I’ve just finished directing a teen camp in Southwest Washington this past week and I have to say that it was quite a satisfying experience.  It is amazing how much you can learn about yourself when working with other people, especially teens!  Teens tend to speak their minds and point out obvious truths that we might miss because of the layers of pretense and posturing that goes on in adults minds.

It was refreshing to hear the questions asked and responses given on subjects as personal as dating and hygiene and as mundane as reading habits or washing clothes.  I need to remember to answer more frankly and without pretense when asked questions about simple things in my life.

One highlight of camp for me was not necessarily directly associated with camp.  With a colleague, I walked three miles every morning during camp.  We would awake at 5:30 a.m. and walk for an hour up into the Washington woods beside the beautiful Washougal River.  I’m not sure why conversations are better during a walk but they seem to be that way.

It was hard to see these walks coming to end as well.  They cleared our minds; got us ready for the day ahead; cemented our goals in regard to camp and overall, brought us closer together as friends.

At home I walk with 3 lb. weights but I didn’t want to drag them along with me because of the size.  So my colleague and I found rocks that were about the same weight and size and used them in place of the regular weights.   It was kind of fun walking through the woods with rocks as weights – it felt as though we were going organic!

At the end of camp my colleague decided to take his “weights” home with him.  He printed his name on them and packed them in his vehicle, ready to use them when he arrived home!  I guess to me it was like a symbol.  It was a symbol of the commitment that we had made during camp.  We both want to continue to exercise and get back into better shape physically and mentally so that we can continue to excel at our professions.  The “weights” were a symbol of that commitment!

What symbols can you have or do you have in your life that can act as a reminder to stay committed to goals and behavior that will help you excel in your life or profession?  Is it important to you to have these mini-motivators in your daily routine?

Think about what can help you stay on track with whatever goals you want to achieve and find a symbol that will encourage you daily to stay committed to the path that you have chosen.  You will be surprised how motivated you will be to your goal if you have a reminder every day.  Don’t pass up this opportunity to excel!

I have discovered a new website that I think will help you excel in one area of your life – vocabulary!  For years, studies have shown a correlation between good communication skills and success in school and vocations.  You can be sent a word a day with its meaning and uses from Wordsmith.org.  I think that you will find it useful.

Kevin Eikenberry examines the proper balance between life and work. Have you ever thought about what is important as far as setting boundaries in our personal and business lives?  Can we stay off the internet at home?  Can we say no to calls that come during supposed family time?  The answers to those questions will determine whether you have balance or imbalance in your life!  Take a look!

Here is one writer's mental wandering through the garden and what memories it brings to life in general.  I hope that we can find something as simple as a garden to bring peace and reflection to our lives.  It's important to remember the simple things that we experience with a sense of context!

As I said in the beginning of this blog, I have learned a lot from the teens that I worked with at summer camp.  They taught me to be more frank and honest with my feelings and behavior and not to get entangled with layers of pretense and posturing.  It is a lesson that I shouldn't forget.  I just hope that I can help them get a sense of perspective as they make their way through their life.  Goal setting is imperative but time out with friends and family are as well.  How we tackle this aspect of our lives will determine what type of input we can give to those within our sphere of influence. Let's not take this lightly!

Until next time,

Jerry de Gier 

Are We Enjoying the Journey?

If you have read very many of my blogs, you will come to realize that I am a big proponent of goal setting. If we don't write down our goals and the road blocks that might occur we will never achieve our true potential. We won't have a road map to follow so we end up somewhere else besides where we want our dreams to take us.

I wonder though if some of us are so goal oriented that we forget the journey that we are on. There is no one who is on this journey alone. All of us have people that care for us, unique environments that surround us and challenges and decisions that can and will define us. Have we come to appreciate the day to day blessings that come by interacting and working with special people and families?

Do we strive for our goals at a pace that precludes any interaction and appreciation of what happens before our very eyes if we are conscious enough to notice it?

Many times we miss so much because we are going through personal trials that blind us to other's needs and desires. Even under substantial stress we should be able to appreciate someone else's needs or wants if we look for it.

Do we appreciate the milestones that happen in our children's lives or our friend's accomplishments that we might unintentionally overlook or undervalue? Do we see the bond that is building between our teenager and our mate? Do we appreciate the effort that our maturing children are taking to communicate, learn and grow? Do we comment on it and add to the sum of the parts?

Have we surveyed what is at our disposal and how it helps us to become a complete person? Do we realize that we are more than just the sum of all our individual parts? When we combine with all the elements around us, we receive strength beyond our resources! Don't diminish the journey and the impact that it should have on us. As I have said before, most of us do not slow down long enough to catch the details.

I am reading a novel by Paul Polak entitled, "Out of Poverty". Polak muses over the traditional ways of fighting poverty. The Western brand of poverty eradication is throwing money at a situation. If it doesn't work we funnel more money at the problem and it still doesn't work. Why not?

Polak states that is because we don't go to the people and listen to what they know is the problem. We make our minds up ahead of time and bulldoze our way to the goal we think is in their mind. It hasn't worked and it never will. When will we as a society and culture stop bulldozing and start listening? Most organizations that help don't listen to the details -- we as members of this society must start to listen! Polak states that we must listen and then think simply in order for success to happen.

You can take a look at the book here.

Some of us have been thrown into situations that are less than ideal. We aren't given concrete guidelines or expectations to govern our plans and that can cause stress for ourselves and those within our sphere of influence. Steve Roesler states that we need feedback from the people who are going to help us the most. Do we stop to listen to them?

Courageous people take the time to assess the journey and contribute in ways that enhance the sum of our parts. Miep Gies was one of those people. She didn't discount the importance of looking around for fellow sojourners and offering help -- she has left us with a legacy of hope and sustainability.

All of us have the opportunity to do something small but important that enhances someone else's life and at the same time, ours as well. What is it that you and I can notice on the way to accomplishing our goals and dreams?

Until next time,

Jerry de Gier

Do Resolutions for Change Really Work?

I've been reading a lot of blogs lately and many of them are full of New Year's resolutions! It is interesting to read about the desire for change in the upcoming year. There are so many different paths that people want to take. Some want to lose weight, some want to get a different job, some want world peace, some want to stop using foul language and others want "free" health insurance and the list goes on and on.

Is writing about change in our lives going to make it better? Perhaps, but what is more important than just writing, dreaming or hoping for change? Isn't making a plan and executing it that is most important?

The reason most resolutions don't work in the long run is because there isn't a plan to follow. We lay out nebulous plans for change and that is exactly what happens -- something nebulous. Well, something definite usually happens -- nothing. We can do this in many areas of our lives until the idea of bettering ourselves hasn't any meaning after a while.

A colleague of mine stated that a friend of hers wanted to go back to college to finish her degreee but has never done it. She said that the friend wanted to get it done quickly but never had the resources to start it or complete it quickly and because of that never got started on it. She said that if her friend would have just taken a course once and a while, over time, she would have finished by now. That takes vision and patience.

Will Marré was asked how long it took to write his latest book. He stated that it took 60 years of experience to put this book together. That takes patience!

People, especially Americans, want everything right now so to take slow, planned, deliberate steps is not our style. The style that many of us employ leads to letdown and ignorance. Please don't do that!

Another stumbling block that stands in our way is the useless information that many of us allow to be placed in our minds. Instead of change for the better, many of us follow the incessant messages that we receive from the society in which we live. We have a herd mentality! We see and hear it around us and we go with the flow of the society and culture that surrounds us. It actually smothers us if we allow it to do that.

What has to happen for effective change to take place? We need to monitor all the areas of input that we can receive and we must define the path that we want to take for the effective change to happen in our lives.

Please don't underestimate the self-control that this will take. Society tells us that it is an easy road to goals that are meaningful. Let me quote Frank A. Clark for an illustration! "If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere." Do we believe this? If we are listening to the society in which we live, probably not! Please don't wait a lifetime to figure this out. It takes hard work to achieve our goals and we have to start sometime and somewhere.

Write your goals down and put them someplace where you can see them every day. But don't just make goals. Make a list of roadblocks that could get in the way. By writing down these roadblocks you will be reminded of them if they pop up in your way. You can then remove them on your way to effective change.

Be accountable to someone. Don't do this on your own -- it rarely works! Include someone who you know will help you move toward your goals. Don't get mad at them when they hold your feet to the fire.

Most of all, I think we need to monitor what we allow to influence us. I can't say enough about that! If you are a religious person, read the Bible more. If you are a person who relies on friends, surround yourself with friends that will build you up. If you are into self-motivation, listen to motivational speakers that teach you balance in your approach. Don't get into an "all or nothing" mentality. It doesn't bring balance into your life.

When we do this, watch patiently as we see what we put into our minds and what we act upon, actually changes our lives in a significant way. It is astounding to witness the changes that can happen in our personal lives. Don't wait -- start now!

Debbie DeSpirt at suite101.com states that we don't have to wait to teach our children how to set and achieve goals. They can be taught at a very young age how to plan for the future and achieve the dreams they desire.

"Have I become largely what people have wanted me to become?" It's a question that is pondered by someone at Thought Rocket blog. The dreams and goals that we set -- are they really ours or are we simply going along with the flow of the society that is around us? A good question to ask all of us!

Kevin Eikenberry states that we should set goals with other people as well. This is especially true with parents! Do we set family goals? In order for our family to be involved in the goals and fulfilling the goals, we must get them excited and involved in setting these goals.

Many times around this time of year there is a lot of excitement about change. Within a short period of time that change turns into inaction and the realization that we have failed again. Perhaps a different perspective needs to be acquired.

I should point out that New Year's Day is just an artificial marker in our lives year in and year out. Why does it have to be around this time of year that we make this kind of decision or goal? Why not strip away the artificial marker and make reaching our dreams and goals a life long pursuit?

I want to leave you with something that my specialist told me during an office visit. He said that many people are realizing that losing weight or dieting is not an end in itself. Losing weight, eating right, exercising and mental preparation are a lifestyle change! Are we willing to commit to a lifestyle change in order to achieve our goals and dreams? If you want to give to yourself and to others you must be prepared to do that!

Until next time,

Jerry de Gier

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