Is writing about change in our lives going to make it better? Perhaps, but what is more important than just writing, dreaming or hoping for change? Isn't making a plan and executing it that is most important?
The reason most resolutions don't work in the long run is because there isn't a plan to follow. We lay out nebulous plans for change and that is exactly what happens -- something nebulous. Well, something definite usually happens -- nothing. We can do this in many areas of our lives until the idea of bettering ourselves hasn't any meaning after a while.
A colleague of mine stated that a friend of hers wanted to go back to college to finish her degreee but has never done it. She said that the friend wanted to get it done quickly but never had the resources to start it or complete it quickly and because of that never got started on it. She said that if her friend would have just taken a course once and a while, over time, she would have finished by now. That takes vision and patience.
Will Marré was asked how long it took to write his latest book. He stated that it took 60 years of experience to put this book together. That takes patience!
People, especially Americans, want everything right now so to take slow, planned, deliberate steps is not our style. The style that many of us employ leads to letdown and ignorance. Please don't do that!
Another stumbling block that stands in our way is the useless information that many of us allow to be placed in our minds. Instead of change for the better, many of us follow the incessant messages that we receive from the society in which we live. We have a herd mentality! We see and hear it around us and we go with the flow of the society and culture that surrounds us. It actually smothers us if we allow it to do that.
What has to happen for effective change to take place? We need to monitor all the areas of input that we can receive and we must define the path that we want to take for the effective change to happen in our lives.
Please don't underestimate the self-control that this will take. Society tells us that it is an easy road to goals that are meaningful. Let me quote Frank A. Clark for an illustration! "If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere." Do we believe this? If we are listening to the society in which we live, probably not! Please don't wait a lifetime to figure this out. It takes hard work to achieve our goals and we have to start sometime and somewhere.
Write your goals down and put them someplace where you can see them every day. But don't just make goals. Make a list of roadblocks that could get in the way. By writing down these roadblocks you will be reminded of them if they pop up in your way. You can then remove them on your way to effective change.
Be accountable to someone. Don't do this on your own -- it rarely works! Include someone who you know will help you move toward your goals. Don't get mad at them when they hold your feet to the fire.
Most of all, I think we need to monitor what we allow to influence us. I can't say enough about that! If you are a religious person, read the Bible more. If you are a person who relies on friends, surround yourself with friends that will build you up. If you are into self-motivation, listen to motivational speakers that teach you balance in your approach. Don't get into an "all or nothing" mentality. It doesn't bring balance into your life.
When we do this, watch patiently as we see what we put into our minds and what we act upon, actually changes our lives in a significant way. It is astounding to witness the changes that can happen in our personal lives. Don't wait -- start now!
Debbie DeSpirt at suite101.com states that we don't have to wait to teach our children how to set and achieve goals. They can be taught at a very young age how to plan for the future and achieve the dreams they desire.
"Have I become largely what people have wanted me to become?" It's a question that is pondered by someone at Thought Rocket blog. The dreams and goals that we set -- are they really ours or are we simply going along with the flow of the society that is around us? A good question to ask all of us!
Kevin Eikenberry states that we should set goals with other people as well. This is especially true with parents! Do we set family goals? In order for our family to be involved in the goals and fulfilling the goals, we must get them excited and involved in setting these goals.
Many times around this time of year there is a lot of excitement about change. Within a short period of time that change turns into inaction and the realization that we have failed again. Perhaps a different perspective needs to be acquired.
I should point out that New Year's Day is just an artificial marker in our lives year in and year out. Why does it have to be around this time of year that we make this kind of decision or goal? Why not strip away the artificial marker and make reaching our dreams and goals a life long pursuit?
I want to leave you with something that my specialist told me during an office visit. He said that many people are realizing that losing weight or dieting is not an end in itself. Losing weight, eating right, exercising and mental preparation are a lifestyle change! Are we willing to commit to a lifestyle change in order to achieve our goals and dreams? If you want to give to yourself and to others you must be prepared to do that!
Until next time,
Jerry de Gier
